6expertsonwhatyoushouldknowabo

　　标题：6
　　source：businessinsider丨CONOROROURKE
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　　We’vehearditamilliontimesbefore：“90ofcommunicationisnonverbal。”
　　Butwhatdoesthatreallymean？Andhowcanyouusethatinformation？Weaskedtheexperts。
　　Whenwetalkaboutlanguage，wealmostalwaysarereferringtowordsandsentences，nouns，verbs，dependentclauses，andallthevariousthingsthatwecanwritedown。
　　However，humancommunicationismuchbroaderthanthatitincludesvariationsintone，emphasis，andentirelynonverbalsignalslikefacialexpressions，eyecontact（orlackthereof），andhandgestures。
　　Eventhedirectionyou’refacingcommunicatessomethingtoyourconversationpartner，regardlessofwhetherornotthey’retotallyawareofit。
　　Clearly，thereisabenefittobeingabletoreliablyread（andproject）nonverbalsignals。Sowhat’sapersontodo？Weconsultedindustryexpertsonnonverbalcommunicationfortheirbesttips。Readon。
　　1。UnderstandingtheFoundationsofNonverbalCommunication
　　Humancommunicationislikeapuzzle，andthewordswespeakarejustasinglepieceofit。IfyouaskJoeNavarro，eachmovement（ornonmovement）apersonmakesinaconversationcommunicatessomething。
　　Bodylanguageisthekeytounderstandingpeople’srealthoughtsandfeelings。Thingslikefacialexpressions，gestures，touching，bodymovements，andvoicetoneandvolumemakeupournonverbalcommunication。
　　AccordingtoJoeNavarro，nonverbalcommunicationissoimportantthattwocompletestrangerswhodon’tsharealanguagecanstillbecomefriends。Hehimselfexperiencedthis：whenhefirstmigratedfromCubatotheUSattheageof8，hecouldonlyunderstandhisclassmatesbyreadingtheirbodylanguage。HeeventuallylearnedEnglish，buthemadefriendsbeforethat。
　　Nonverbalcuescanbemorereliablethanthespokenword。Peoplearen’talwaysawareofthenonverbalsignalstheysend，soifthey’relying，thetruthmightbehiddenintheirnonverbalcues。
　　Emotionalintelligenceiskeytonavigatingthesocialworld
　　Somepeopleareuncommonlygoodatreadingbodylanguage，abletojudgeataglancewhatsomeoneisthinkingandrespondaccordingly。Theycancalmacoworkerwho’sangry，orreassureafriendwho’sanxious。
　　Whyarecertainpeoplesogoodatthis？IfyouaskTravisBradberryandJeanGreaves，theanswerhastodowithemotionalintelligence，orEQ。TheywroteabookaboutitcalledEmotionalIntelligence2。0。
　　InEmotionalIntelligence2。0，theauthorsexplainthatemotionalintelligenceistheabilitytorecognizeandunderstandyourownfeelingsandthefeelingsofothers，andinfluencethosefeelingstoyouradvantage。Apersonwho’sgoodat“reading”peoplehashighemotionalintelligence。
　　EQismadeupoffourdifferentelements：
　　Selfawareness，theabilitytounderstandyourownfeelingsandbehaviors。
　　Selfmanagement，theabilitytokeepyourselfinsituationsinwhichyouknowyou’llbeabletobehavecorrectly。
　　SocialAwareness，theabilitytounderstandwhatmakespeoplefeelangry，sadorexcited，andreaditintheirbodylanguage。
　　Relationshipmanagement，thatis，understandinghowyourownbehavioraffectsanddeterminesthebehaviorofothersaroundyou。Thisisalsocalledempathy。
　　ByfocusingondevelopingthesefouraspectsofEQ，youwillbecomeamoresensitive，empathetic，andenjoyablepersontoworkwith。DevelopingyourEQwillleadtodirectbenefitsinyourcareer：accordingtotheauthorsofEmotionalIntelligence2。0，“thelinkbetweenEQandearningsissodirectthateverypointincreaseinEQadds1，300toanannualsalary。”
　　Readin10minutes：EmotionalIntelligenceTravisBradberryandJeanGreaves。
　　manlaptoplisteningwomanspeakingexplainingNataliaBudantsevaStrelkaInstituteflickrReallyfocusonyournonverbalcues。
　　2。WinningPeopleOverWithNonverbalCues
　　InTheLikeSwitch，JackSchaferandMarvinKarlinsbreakdowntheuniversalnonverbalsignalsusedbyhumansandtellyouhowtousethemtoyouradvantage。
　　Ifyouaskthem，humanshavealotincommonwithanunlikelyanimal：thehumblefirefly。Likefireflies，humansuseaspecialsignaltoattractpositiveattention。It’sobviouswhatfirefliesuse，butifyouknowwhattolookfor，it’snotsohardtoseeinhumanseithertheycallitthe“eyebrowflash。”
　　Thisnonverbalcueisarapidupanddownmovementoftheeyebrows，lastingforaroundonesixthofasecond。Evenfromquitefaraway，aneyebrowflashsendsasignalthatyoudon’tposeathreattothepersonyou’reapproaching。
　　Asecondprimarynonverbalcueistheheadtilt。Thisisanonthreateninggesture，sincetiltingyourheadtotheleftortherightexposesoneofyourcarotidarteries，whichprovidesoxygenatedbloodtothebrain。
　　Weunconsciouslyexposethesearteriesonlytopeoplewhoareharmless。Conversely，wetuckourneckintoourshoulderstoprotectourselveswhenwefeelthreatened。
　　Athirdpowerfulnonverbalsignalisagenuinesmile。Wejudgethosewithsmilingfacestobemorelikable，attractiveandlessdominant，aswellasfriendly。
　　Asanaddedbonus，asmilereleasesendorphins，givingusasenseofwellbeing。It’areciprocatedsmilemakesyourtargetfeelgood。
　　3。3TricksforGaugingRapport
　　Itcanbehardtoknowwhatsomeonethinksofyou。But，contrarytowhatpeoplesayoutloud，bodylanguagemightbroadcastsomeone’srealfeelingsloudandclear。IfyouaskJackSchaferandMarvinKarlins，authorsofTheLikeSwitch，allyouhavetodoislearnhowtolisten。
　　Bodylanguage，likeanyformoflanguage，isameansofcommunication，whichmeansothersreadyourbodylanguagetoo。Althoughsomeinvoluntaryphysicalresponsescanonlybecontrolledwithrigoroustraining，insomesituationswecanconsciouslyemphasizecertainmovementstoouradvantage。
　　ForJackSchaferandMarvinKarlins，it’sallaboutrapport。Rapportisthenameforthepsychologicalbridgebetweenpeople。It’sanameforthesetofphenomenonthatweseeascharacteristicoftwogoodfriends，theunspokenbondandunderstanding。
　　Butallpeoplearedifferent。Somepeopleareshy，andcan’texpressthemselveswell。Itcanbehardtoreadthesepeople，hardtofindouthowtheyfeelaboutyou。Butmostpeoplearestillbroadcastingvolumesabouttheirfeelingsandemotionalstate：withtheirbodylanguage。
　　firstdatecouplesmilinglaughingShutterstockSmilingiskey。
　　Sohowdoyougaugerapport？TheLikeSwitchoutlinesthese3ways。
　　Eyecontactisatriedandtruewaytotestforrapport。Ifapersonrefusestolockeyeswithyou，therelationshipmightneedsomemoremaintenancebeforeadvancingtothestageofprolongedeyecontact。
　　Noteinstancesofphysicaltouch。Whilewetypicallyonlybrieflytoucheachotherbelowtheshouldersorshakehandswhenwedon’tknowsomeone，touchingthatoccursoutsidethisareasignifiesacloserrelationship。Alighttouchontheforearmorkneewhenyouarebothseatedwillshowwhetherrapporthasbeenestablishedornot。
　　Usemirroring，alsocalledisopraxism，totestforrapport。Peoplewhoarepsychologicallyconnectedwilloftenmirroreachother’sbodylanguageinconversation。Trythe“leadandfollow”approachbychangingyourbodyposition，likecrossingoruncrossingyourarms。Iftheotherpersonmirrorsyou，it’sagoodsignthatrapporthasbeenestablished。
　　Byknowingwhattolookfor，youcanbetterjudgeaperson’sopinionofyou，orevenotherpeople。Italsogoestheotherway：utilizingthesetestsinreverse，bymaintainingeyecontact，touching，ormirroringyourconversationpartner，canalsoservetosubconsciouslyindicateyouraffectionorrespectforthem。
　　Thesebehaviorsandtheinsighttheyprovidecanbeinvaluablewhenjudgingpotentialemployeesorbusinesspartners，butcanalsobeusefulinyourpersonallife。
　　Readin10minutes：TheLikeSwitchJackSchaferandMarvinKarlins
　　Nonverbalcommunicationisanindispensableworkplacetool
　　You’vehearditfromtheexperts：ifyou’rerelyingonlyonspokenandwrittenlanguagetocommunicate，you’remissingout。Infact，there’sabroadspectrumofcommunicationtoolsavailabletohumans，aspectrumthatgoesfarbeyondsimplespokenlanguage。
　　Sothenexttimeyou’restrugglingtorelatetosomeone（ortogetthemtorelatetoyou），rememberwhatourpanelofexpertssaid，andtakeamomenttoobservetheirbodylanguage。Itdoesabodygood。