世间所有的遗憾，都是成全

　　柯林斯说：嗨，宝贝，晚上好，我亲爱的海伦，你在干嘛。我可以今天在这里和你说话吗？
　　Collins said, ＂Hi, Baby. Good evening, my dear Helen. What are you doing ?＂.Can I talk to you here today?
　　海伦说：我今天去县城修手机了，不然我没办法工作，也没办法跟你说话，我平时两个手机工作，但是信息量太大了，手机内存有点小，丢了觉得有点可惜，我修理一下应该还可以用一段时间，所以就去了县城一趟，顺便看看我弟弟和他的小女朋友，我也想他们了，顺便我看看有没有我喜欢的手机，买一部新的用，这样我文案策划和资料就不会丢失了。
　　Helen said: I went to the county today to repair the cell phone, Otherwise I have no way to work, Also have no way to talk to you, I usually two cell phone work, But the amount of information is too big, Cell phone memory is a little small, Lost feel a little pity, I repair it should also can use for a while, So I went to the county trip, By the way to see my brother and his little girlfriend, I also want them, By the way, I will see if there is a cell phone I like and buy a new one, so that my copywriting plan and information will not be lost.
　　柯林斯说：你还有弟弟，他在县城做什么的，我感觉你和弟弟感情很好的。
　　Collins said: ＂You have a brother, he is doing something in the county, I feel that you and your brother＂s feelings are very good.＂
　　海伦说：我有两个弟弟，我们姐弟之间感情特别好，我现在能够很好的活着，就是当年弟弟在我抑郁自杀那段时间很好的陪着我，照顾我，我用的网名也是他给我的，他是很棒的男孩子，我一直觉得我有这样的弟弟，我感觉很骄傲的，我弟弟字写的很漂亮，我很喜欢，他是个努力上进的好孩子，并且做饭好吃，他每次给我做吃的，我都很喜欢的，总之我有个弟弟，他让我觉得生命很温暖，所以我生了两个孩子，我希望她们姐妹长大以后也可以和她的妈妈和舅舅一样，感情很好，人生危难时刻可以相互帮助，这样哪怕人生有无法避免的风险和困难，但是亲情的力量总是很伟大的。并且在困境中觉得生命存在着温暖和希望，这也是亲人之间爱的意义所在，虽然生孩子对我这种对身体痛苦承受能力很弱的人来说确实很痛苦，但是我还是选择生了二胎，两个丫头可以一起相伴成长。
　　Helen said: I have two younger brothers. The relationship between our siblings and brothers is very good. I can live very well now, that is, when my younger brother was very good with me and took care of me when I was suicidal in depression. The name was given to me by him. He is a great boy. I always think I have such a younger brother. I feel very proud. My younger brother writes beautifully. I like it very much. He is a good kid who works hard. And the cooking is delicious, every time he cooks for me,
　　I like it very much. In short, I have a younger brother who makes me feel that life is very warm, so I have two children. I hope their sisters can grow up to be like her mother and uncle, with a good relationship and life. You can help each other in times of crisis, so that even if there are unavoidable risks and difficulties in life, the power of family affection is always great. And in a difficult situation, I feel that there is warmth and hope in life, which is also the meaning of love between relatives.
　　Although having a child is really painful for someone like me who is very weak to bear physical pain, I still choose to have a second child, and the two girls can grow up together.
　　我今天找他的时候，他过来接我和孩子，他平时闲了在家里练习他喜欢的毛笔字，我想念他给我做的饭菜，以前我们两个人一起读书住一起的时候，他经常给我做饭，他是很阳光的男孩，总是问我，姐姐我今天的发型是不是很帅，并且很开朗的样子，我和弟弟一起生活的很多画面都是幸福的，他很清楚我喜欢什么，每次看我，总是给我和孩子带一些东西，我喜欢他做的饭，我们聊天的感觉，很自由很开心的感觉，看他给我做的饭，我弟弟在我心里是一个美好的人，我经常叫她清弟，他叫我瑜姐，我们感情很好的。
　　When I was looking for him today, he came to pick up me and my children. He usually practiced his favorite brush writing at home when he was free. I miss the food he cooked for me. When we were reading and living together, he often cooked for me. He was a very sunny boy and always asked me, ＂Sister, is my hairstyle very handsome today?＂ Many pictures of my brother and I living together are happy. He knows what I like very well. Every time he looks at me, he always brings something to me and my children. I like the meal he cooks. The feeling of chatting with us is very free and happy. Seeing the meal he cooks for me, my brother is a beautiful person in my heart. I often call her Qingdi, and he calls me Sister Yu. We have a good relationship.
　　柯林斯说：你弟弟长的好帅啊，都可以拍电影的那种，看起来真是一个特别棒的男孩子，他给我的感觉也非常的美好，我为你有这样的弟弟而感到很开心，应该谢谢他当年救了你，不然我就遇不到你了，他真的很了不起。
　　Collins said: Your brother is so handsome, he can make movies. He looks like a really good boy. He feels very good to me. I am very happy that you have such a brother. , I should thank him for saving you back then, otherwise I will not meet you, he is really amazing.
　　海伦说：给你看个我们这里的大自然吧，其实夏季也很美的，我很喜欢的。我单身那时候，我梦想可以周游世界，但是我现在才走过中国不多的几个城市和旅游景点，每次我网络看到我喜欢的城市和旅游景点的时候，我都会保存到我的博客里，那是我未来努力想要去的远方，世界这么大，这么美好，我以后一定会去看看。
　　Helen said: Let me show you the nature here. In fact, summer is also very beautiful. I like it very much. When I was single, I dreamed of traveling around the world, but now I have walked through a few cities and tourist attractions in China. Every time I see cities and tourist attractions that I like on the Internet, I will save them to my In the blog, that is the far place I will strive to go to in the future. The world is so big and beautiful, I will definitely visit it in the future.
　　我要好好学习，让自己提升和扩大自己的眼界以及对世界的认知，因为孩子是透过母亲看世界的，所以我要努力做一个美好的人，这对孩子以后的教育很重要，我自己的爸爸妈妈在我从小到大的记忆中不美好，总是抱怨，他们从不读书学习，带着暴力争吵，我小时候就在思考，我以后如果做父母，我要做有智慧有学识看起来很美好优雅的妈妈，并且可以用爱和影响力让我孩子觉得她愿意活成妈妈的样子。
　　I want to study hard and let myself improve and expand my horizons and understanding of the world. Because children see the world through their mothers, I have to work hard to be a good person. This is very important for my children’s future education. My parents are not good in my childhood memories. They always complain. They never read or study, and quarrel with violence. I was thinking when I was a child. If I become a parent in the future, I must be wise and knowledgeable. A beautiful and elegant mother,
　　And can use love and influence to make my child feel that she is willing to live like a mother.
　　我希望我的孩子在欣赏和鼓励里成长的自信阳光，能够看到自己的潜能和价值，而不是和我小时候一样被吼叫打骂式的教育，我小时候不是被大人拿来和别人家孩子比较，就是被辱骂不如别人，从而导致我被这种家庭教育折磨的做事紧张慌乱，性格缺陷特别多，我那时候觉得我在自己大人心里，简直就是多余的垃圾，仿佛他们世界里的不如意都是因为我，我的父母家人都说，都是为了你，我才活的很累，你还不好好学习，考了这么低的成绩，太对不起大人，那时候的我是多么自责和难过。以致于我从小到大遇到困难都自我否定和放弃，差点抑郁自杀死了，所以我要做一个快乐的父母，不会把自己幸福寄托在孩子身上，而是教会孩子如何找到她们存在的价值，我相信一个努力活好的母亲，一定是对孩子有好的影响。
　　I hope that my children can see their own potential and value in the self-confident sunshine that grows in appreciation and encouragement, instead of being yelled and beaten as I was when I was a child. When I was a child, I was not used by adults to compare with other children. , That is, being insulted as inferior to others, which caused me to be nervous and flustered by this kind of family education, and had many personality defects. At that time, I felt that I was just extra rubbish in my adult heart, as if the unsatisfactory things in their world because I, My parents and family members said that it was all because of you that I was very tired. You still didn＂t study well, and I was too sorry for the adults at that time. I was so sorry and sad at that time. As a result, when I was a child, when I encountered difficulties, I denied and gave up. I was almost depressed and killed myself. Therefore, I will be a happy parent. I will not trust my happiness on my children, but teach my children how to find their existence. Value, I believe that a mother who works hard to live a good life must have a good impact on her children.
　　我现在的成长都是在疗愈曾经的童年的创伤和阴影，每次小时候创伤在我生活中被看到，我内心无比痛苦，我就是这么一点一点艰难的前行，幸福的人总是用童年治愈一生，而不幸的一生，总是用一生疗愈童年的创伤，虽然疗愈自己内心的小孩让自己很痛苦，但是为了我更好的人生，我必须从内而外的让自己变得更好，我一直和自己这么说，不过在我面对这一切的时候，我确实变得更好，更懂得爱，懂得珍惜以及美好，我好好好努力，遇见那个更美好的自己，现在的自己已经不怨恨自己的父母，毕竟他们自己都不懂的如何活好自己，怎么懂得教育我，反而我和自己的过去和解以后，我人生轻松很多。
　　I now grow up in the healing of the trauma and shadow of childhood, every time the trauma of childhood is seen in my life, my heart is extremely painful, I am so difficult to move forward bit by bit, happy people always use childhood to heal life, and unfortunate life, always use life to heal the trauma of childhood, although healing their inner children. But for my better life, I must make myself better from the inside out, I have always said so to myself, but in the face of all this, I do become better, know more about love, know how to cherish and good, I will work hard to meet that better self, now I do not hate my parents. After all, they do not know how to live their own, how to educate me, but I and their past reconciliation, my life is much easier.
　　我希望我孩子看到我，不会和我当年看到自己父母那样，从而觉得自己活在人间地狱里，从而后悔自己来到这个世上。所以我要好好经营好自己，让自己尽可能做一个看起来还算不错的妈妈，等我女儿大点了，我就可以带她们和家人出去看看世界，现在她们太小了，我就在美好的田园生活中陪伴老人孩子学习成长，我认为我现在的生活也很美好的。
　　I hope that my children will not see me like I saw their parents back then, and feel that they are living in hell on earth, and regret that they have come into this world. So I have to manage myself well and try my best to be a good-looking mother. When my daughters are older, I can take them and my family out to see the world. Now they are too young and I am here. Accompanying the elderly and children to learn and grow in the beautiful pastoral life, I think my current life is also very good.
　　柯林斯说：我跟你一样，也非常热爱大自然，这也是我为什么非常喜欢旅行和探索这个世界的原因，以后有机会，我一定会带你和孩子去看世界很多不同的地方，我的父母虽然离开我，但是他们给予我很多的爱和关怀，他们确实是很好的父母，我很怀念他们，我知道你早年的成长有很多创伤，但是亲爱的海伦不要担心，因为你是非常勇敢的人，你可以坦诚的面对自己的内心和那个不完美的自己，这也就是你为什么可以变得比过去好的原因，只有你接纳过去那个不好的自己，你才可以变得更好，相信我，你现在还有我不是吗？我会陪你成为那个更好的自己，因为你在我心里，是那个最棒的海伦！
　　Collins said: I am like you, and I love nature very much. This is the reason why I like to travel and explore the world so much. I will take you and your children to see many different places in the world when I have the opportunity in the future. My parents Although they left me, they gave me a lot of love and care. They are indeed very good parents. I miss them very much. I know that your early growth has many traumas, but don’t worry, dear Helen, Because you are a very brave person, you can face your heart and that imperfect self frankly. This is why you can become better than the past. Only if you accept the bad self in the past, you can Can be better, trust me, you still have me now, don’t you? I will accompany you to become that better self, because you are the best Helen in my heart!
　　海伦说：在我心里，凡一切过往，皆为序章，假如上天给你这样的一份生活，我便相信一切自有天意，我只需要把自己的日子过好，这就是幸福的捷径，我一直都是这么理解我的人生。人生最为快意之事，是我每次大难不死，从地狱爬上来的那一刻，让意识到自己从苦难中不断突围才是我真正活着的意义。
　　Helen said: In my heart, everything in the past is a prologue. If God gives you such a life, I believe that everything has its own will. I only need to live my life well. This is the shortcut to happiness. I I have always understood my life this way. The most enjoyable thing in life is that every time I survive a catastrophe, the moment I climb up from hell, I realize that I am constantly breaking through from the suffering that is the meaning of my life.
　　被命运安排这样活着的我，并不认为人生一路都顺是一件好事，这或许在别人眼里是一种幸运，但是与我而言，一个一路都顺利的人，据我观察，得出一个结论，我身边每个比我现实处境好的人，各方面都比较顺利的人，她们往往感觉生活很无趣。我很多一起读书的同学都比我人生顺利太多了，我觉得她们的人生都是直通车，导致我对自己的人生产生一种错觉，我仿佛总是被命运甩在最后的哪一个人，从而使我人生的每一步都无比的艰难了，我每次咬牙一个人挺过来的那一刻，我的生命便获得重生，或许在我生命危难时刻，命运之神会给我安排一个天使守护我，我弟弟就是在我抑郁自杀的时候，守护我的那个天使。只有接近死亡很近的人才会思考活着的意义，我会懂得如何更好的活着，假如我生命没有经历这些苦难的陪衬，那么我人生的幸福也显得寡淡无味。
　　Arranged by fate to live like this, I do not think that life is a good thing all the way smoothly, which may be a kind of luck in the eyes of others, but for me, a person who is all the way smoothly, according to my observation, come to a conclusion that everyone around me is better than my real situation, all aspects of the people who are relatively smooth, they often feel that life is very boring. Many of my classmates who studied together had a much smoother life than I did. I felt that their lives were all through trains, which led me to have an illusion about my own life.It seems that I am always the last person left by fate, which makes every step of my life extremely difficult. Every time I grind my teeth and survive alone, my life will be reborn. Perhaps at the critical moment of my life, the God of fate will arrange an angel to guard me. My brother is the angel who guards me when I commit suicide in depression. Only those who are very close to death will think about the meaning of living, I will know how to live better, if my life does not experience the foil of these hardships, then the happiness of my life seems insipid.
　　而像我这种出生以来就历经沧桑者，回想小时候的自己在经历各种苦难折磨的时候，我幻想自己的人生可以如同电视机里节目频道，我自己可以掌握遥控器，遇到痛苦的时候能够按下遥控器的暂停键，或者可以换成其他幸福的频道，就好比我看电视不喜欢看的节目，我可以用遥控器选择其他的节目或者暂停，但是我发现我错了，我越是逃避，人生与之而来的痛苦越是无比的强烈，我逃无可逃，避无可避，我只能选择接纳命运安排到我生命中的一切，从而不在抱怨，并与痛苦握手言和，结伴而行，久而久之我走出来一次又一次的痛苦，我从而获得了面对生命的勇气，我有时候都会崇拜自己像个英雄，因为我从命运之神安排给我的苦难里凯旋而归，获得了掌握人生幸福的遥控器，那就是我选择用怎么样的心态解读我的人生。
　　And people like me who have gone through vicissitudes of life since I was born, when I think back when I was a child, when I experienced all kinds of hardships, I imagined that my life could be like a TV program channel, and I could control the remote control. I can press the pause button on the remote control, or I can change to other happy channels, just like watching TV programs that I don’t like. I can use the remote control to select other programs or pause, but I found that I was wrong.
　　The more I evade, the more painful life comes from it. There is no escape, and there is no way to avoid it. I can only choose to accept everything that fate has arranged in my life, so as not to complain, and to suffer Shaking hands and making peace, walking in company, over time, I came out of pain again and again, and I gained the courage to face life. Sometimes I worship myself like a hero, because I am from the misery arranged by the God of Destiny. Triumphant return, Obtaining the remote control to master the happiness of life is the mentality I choose to interpret my life.
　　我无法选择命运给我怎样的人生，比如我的出生，在我很小的时候，被父母不公平对待的时候，我认为人生最不公平的事就是我无法选择自己的出生，我小时候恨透了我是我父母的孩子，而我也发现原生家庭就是我一生无法逃避的宿命。
　　I can＂t choose what kind of life fate gives me, such as my birth. When I was very young, I was treated unfairly by my parents. I think the most unfair thing in life is that I can＂t choose my own birth. When I was a child, I hated that I was the child of my parents, and I also found that the original family was the fate that I could not escape in my life.
　　我拥有个精神病的母亲和一个暴力倾向的父亲以及对我有极强控制欲的姨妈，我身边最亲的人简直是我童年的一场噩梦，我觉得自己从小身处在他们上一辈家庭矛盾中不可自拔，这样的痛苦持续三十年，家庭矛盾纷争是导致我抑郁自杀的根本原因，矛盾对立的家庭导致我人格分裂，久而久之导致抑郁高峰期而出现自杀行为。
　　I have a mentally ill mother, a violent father and an aunt who has a strong desire to control me. The closest person to me is a nightmare of my childhood. I feel that I have been in their previous family since I was a child. I cannot extricate myself from conflicts. This kind of pain lasted for 30 years. Family conflicts and disputes were the root cause of my depression and suicide. The contradictory family led to my personality split, which over time led to suicidal behavior at the peak of depression.
　　唯独对我伤害比较少的是我的爷爷奶奶，我小时候有次做梦，梦见上帝和我说，我有什么心愿，我和上帝说，我希望自己的人生我可以自己控制剧情，我可以设定人生的剧本，多年以后的我，我心之所愿都在我潜意识吸引下，通过我自己的努力不断实现，我的人生中出现的一切都是我自己梦想的设定剧本。
　　The only thing that hurt me less is my grandparents. When I was a child, I had a dream. I dreamed that God told me what I wanted. I told God that I hope that I can control the plot of my life by myself. The script for setting life, many years later, my wish is attracted by my subconscious mind, and it is realized through my own efforts. Everything that appears in my life is the setting script of my own dream.
　　柯林斯说：我亲爱的海伦，我发现你才是生命中真正的强者，你人生成长的轨迹使我内心此刻感到无比的震撼，也让我无比的心疼这样一个你，但我相信你会成为那个最好的自己，我希望你找到生命的勇气，过上你真正想要的人生，因为我心里的海伦配得上更好的人生，宝贝，你必须更加的努力，然后期待结果，亲爱海伦，你告诉我，你从小到大内心的梦想是什么？
　　Collins said: My dear Helen, I found that you are the real powerhouse in life. The trajectory of your life’s growth has shocked my heart at this moment, and it also made me feel very sorry for you, but I believe you will become That best self, I hope you find the courage to live and live the life you really want, because the Helen in my heart is worthy of a better life, baby, you must work harder and look forward to the result, dear Helen , Tell me, what is your inner dream since childhood?
　　海伦说：我小时候遇到太多困难事，我希望自己拥有超能力，我可以预知未来，并且我希望我可以像我看过电视剧里我特别喜欢的女主那样，看起来很可爱，满身才华，并且很善良，和天使一样拥有光芒，我能够给遇见我的人带来温暖和希望，我喜欢这样的自己，每次这么想都会让我特别开心，所以我仿佛时刻都会进入这种状态，其实我一直活在自己的内心世界的人，换而言之，我是活在自己想象中的那个人，现实世界对我影响相对而言比较小。
　　Helen said: I encountered too many difficult things when I was a child, I hope I have super powers, I can predict the future, and I hope that I can look cute and full of body like the heroine I especially like in TV series. Talented, kind, and radiant like an angel, I can bring warmth and hope to people who meet me. I like myself like this. Every time I think about it, it makes me very happy, so I seem to be in this state all the time.
　　所以我每次看到影视作品里我喜欢角色，我会把自己幻想成为她们，在我每次遇到困难或者被不公平对待的时候，我会停下来思考，如果我是我喜欢的影视作品里的角色，我会如何面对自己当下人生，我要做我人生的创作者，也就是我命运的主人，后面我会通过自己的梦境预知我现实里出现的吉凶，并且每次很准确，我很相信周公解梦里说的，但是我不喜欢不好梦境，每次梦到，如果我对照周公解梦是不好的梦境，我会做好自己内心的调整，不好的梦境也会被我从新解读，我从小到大这种直觉很好，并且特别准确，我能够通过自己直觉找到和我命运与之匹配的人。
　　So every time I see my favorite characters in movies and TV works, I will fantasize myself as them, and every time I encounter difficulties or are treated unfairly, I will stop and think, if I were the characters in my favorite movies and TV works, how would I face my present life? I want to be the creator of my life, that is, the master of my destiny. Later, I will predict the good or bad luck in my reality through my dream, and every time it is very accurate. I believe what Zhou Gong said in his dream interpretation, but I don＂t like bad dreams. Every time I dream, if I compare Zhou Gong＂s dream interpretation with bad dreams, I will adjust my heart well, and bad dreams will be re-interpreted by me. I have a good intuition from childhood to adulthood, and it is particularly accurate. I can use my intuition to find someone who is compatible with my destiny.
　　柯林斯说：宝贝，我觉得你人生真无比神奇，我想知道你人生现实生活中通过你想象都发生那些事，我现在对你感到无比的好奇？我觉得你人生的故事特别有趣？我很想知道你都经历了什么？
　　Collins said: ＂Baby, I think your life is really incredible, I want to know your life in real life through your imagination what happened, I am now incredibly curious about you.＂? I think your life story is very interesting? I＂d like to know what you＂ve been through?
　　海伦说：因为我从小到大最让我不满意的就是我的父母，然后我根据自己内心虚拟假设出一个父母，很多年以后，我这个愿望梦想成真了，我拥有了一对公婆，他们就是我小时候我内心深处比较满意的父母，他们出现在我生命中的那一刻，我的直觉告诉我，这就是我要找的父母，小时候爷爷奶奶最疼爱我了，所以我根据爷爷奶奶给我的感觉我假设刻画着一个理想的父母，结果我多年以后找到婆婆和养我长大的奶奶很相似，婆婆和我如同母女一样，我们会说很多话，她每天给我做饭，小时候我母亲没对我做的事，我婆婆都在给我做，并且和我小时候想象中的基本差不多，我母亲没对我做的事，我通过婆婆得到了一种弥补。
　　Helen said: Because I have been dissatisfied with my parents since I was a child, and then I hypothesized a parent based on my heart. After many years, my wish and dream came true. I have a pair of in-laws. They are the parents who were more satisfied in my heart when I was a child. At the moment when they appeared in my life, my instinct told me that this is the parent I was looking for. When I was a child, my grandparents loved me the most, so I gave it according to my grandparents. My feeling I assume that I portray an ideal parent, As a result, I found my mother-in-law and the grandmother who raised me many years later. My mother-in-law and I are like mother and daughter. We talk a lot. She cooks for me every day. What my mother didn’t do to me when I was a child, my mother-in-law did I made it for me, and it was almost the same as I imagined when I was a child. What my mother did not do to me, I got a kind of compensation through my mother-in-law.
　　而我公公就是和我当年的爷爷很像，并且还是在我爷爷的葬礼上给我爷爷写祭文的人，我爷爷生前是读书人，并且也是一个经常给他人写祭文的人，我基本从小到大听着爷爷的祭文长大，并且我听过爷爷给我讲很多神话鬼怪故事长大的，我从小热爱读书都是受到爷爷的影响，我在看到公公的那一刻，我就知道那就是我要找的人，后面我婚姻就被这样安排了，公公是我小时候村子里小学的校长。
　　Later, my marriage was arranged like this. My father-in-law was the principal of the elementary school in the village when I was young.
　　在我童年记忆中，公公是唯一一个对我留下深刻印象的人，其他周围的老师同学都歧视我，唯独他没有，我五岁被送去村里小学上学前班，我特别喜欢学习，于是我爬到教室的窗台上，偷偷的听公公给一年级学生读语文，那时候我公公读到课文是《春天来了》桃花开了，梨花开了，我在教室的玻璃窗外跟着公公的领读，嘴里也读着，那是我小时候特别开心的记忆，后面下课了，窗台太高了，我不敢跳下来，公公走出教室把我从窗台上抱了下来，我当时还以为有人要打我，我下意识的喊着，那个大坏蛋抓我，快点放开我，我回头一看，是那个教室上课的老师，但是他没有骂我，对着我笑了一下，而那一刻我觉得他是最好的老师，我放学回家以后，还很开心的把这件事和我奶奶说了。
　　In my childhood memory, Father is the only one left a deep impression on me, The other teachers around the students all discriminate against me, But he didn＂t. I was five years old was sent to the village primary school preschool, I especially like to learn, So I climbed to the classroom on the windowsill, Secretly listen to father to grade one students read Chinese. At that time my father read the text is 《 Spring is coming 》 The peach blossom When the pear blossoms blossomed, I followed my father-in-law＂s lead outside the glass window of the classroom and read it in my mouth, which was a very happy memory of my childhood.After class, the windowsill was too high, I dared not jump down, my father-in-law went out of the classroom and held me down from the windowsill. I thought someone was going to hit me at that time. I subconsciously shouted, ＂The big bad guy caught me, let me go quickly.＂ I looked back and saw that it was the teacher in the classroom, but he did not scold me. He smiled at me. At that moment, I thought he was the best teacher. When I came home from school, I was very happy to tell my grandmother about it.
　　我们村子那时候的小学，都是一个班主任把学生从一年级带到五年级毕业，中间不会换班主任，学习科目只有语文和数学，也是一个班主任带就可以，除非一个学生考试科目不够六十分留级，不然是无法换班主任，而我小学五年的生活简直倒霉透顶，我第一学期总是语文数学考试三四十分无法及格，每次考试下来，都被班主任打用板子打的手心红肿到痛到握不住拳头，实在太痛苦。
　　In the elementary school in our village at that time, a class teacher took the students from grade one to grade five. There was no change of head teacher in the middle. The subjects of study were only Chinese and mathematics, and it was enough for a head teacher, unless a student had less than 60 subjects in the exam. Repeated grades, otherwise it would be impossible to change the head teacher, and my five-year life in elementary school was terribly unlucky. In the first semester, I always failed the Chinese and math exam 30 or 40 minutes. Every time I finished the exam, I was beaten by the head teacher with the palm of the board. The swelling was so painful that I couldn＂t hold my fist. It was too painful.
　　我那时候特别羡慕那些得了感冒可以写请假条不用去学校的学生，但是我总是不会得感冒，我也不敢逃学，我只能每天忍受被老师课堂提问回答不上来，然后被班主任打骂，并且都是当着全班同学老师辱骂我，老师说我是全班最笨的孩子，简直和我妈一样是个神经病，如果我能够学好，猪都可以来学校读书，然后全班同学都笑我，和班主任一样的骂我，我每次写的作业特别整齐，但是我不会做题，经常做错，我也不敢问老师，以致于我作业本上的题目都是老师画的错号，但是我还是很认真的做完每次作业，其他学生也不愿意教我正确答案。
　　At that time, I especially envied those students who had caught a cold and could write a leave note without going to school. But I always didn＂t catch a cold, and I didn＂t dare to play truant. I could only endure being questioned and answered by the teacher in class every day. Then I was beaten and scolded by the head teacher, and I was abused by the teacher in front of the whole class. The teacher said that I was the most stupid child in the class. It was like my mother. If I can learn well, pigs can come to school to study, and then the whole class laughed at me, and the head teacher scolded me, every time I write the homework is particularly neat, but I will not do the problem, often wrong, I dare not ask the teacher, so that the title of my homework is the wrong number drawn by the teacher, but I am still very serious. The other students were reluctant to teach me the correct answers.
　　一起的同学经常会欺负我，一次好几个同学都会打我，我小时候被好几个同学围攻欺负，从而我被推倒墙角，那时候我刚换的新牙齿，被磕的满口是血，我一个多月都疼的无法吃东西，奶奶每次给我上学带的馍馍，都会被学校那些厉害的学生抢走吃了，不好吃的也不让我吃，丢地上踩几脚也不让我吃，还威胁我说，如果我告诉家人，就打死我，于是我偷偷把同学踩了的馒头捡起来带回家给我们家小狗吃，不敢告诉家人，我的作业本经常被同学撕破，还有我的课本也是，我经常被其他学生作弄，有次我被一个男生打的次数多了，他还抢走了我奶奶给我做的新沙包丢教室房顶上不让我玩，我那时候特别愤怒，我狠狠打了对方两巴掌，那时候我七岁，而后那个男孩再也没敢欺负我。
　　My classmates would often bully me. Several classmates would beat me at a time. When I was a child, I was mobbed and bullied by several classmates, so I was pushed down the corner. At that time, the new teeth I had just replaced were full of blood. I was more than one. I was so painful that I couldn’t eat every month. Every time my grandma brought me to school, the buns would be snatched away by the school’s powerful students. I would not be allowed to eat anything that was not tasty, nor would I be allowed to step on the ground a few feet. Eat and threaten me that if I tell my family,
　　I was beaten to death, so I secretly picked up the buns that my classmates stepped on and took them home to our puppies. I didn’t dare to tell my family that my homework books were often torn by classmates, and so did my textbooks. I often I was tricked by other students. One time I was beaten by a boy too many times. He even snatched the new sandbags my grandma made for me and threw them on the roof of the classroom to prevent me from playing. I was very angry at that time and I hit hard. I slapped the other side twice. I was seven years old at that time, and the boy never dared to bully me again.
　　我母亲是精神病患者，我出生以来不知道正常的母亲是什么样子，她每天在学校的山头哭着唱着有时候骂人，疯的太厉害就跑的找不到人了，我小时候记忆里的母亲经常是被绑起来，我经常和母亲一起睡，母亲经常吵我不能写作业，我做梦都梦到母亲发疯打我走失了，其他孩子都歧视我，我前面再走，其他孩子背后用石头丢我，骂我是疯婆子生的孩子，我就这么度过了自己的童年，那简直就是我人生的一场噩梦，我越是讨厌我的班主任，他的行为引发其他同学对我的歧视和不停的伤害，我内心好狠我那时候的班主任，越是恨班主任，我内心越是渴望换成我公公做我班主任，当时小学的校长，但是这个愿望没实现，因为每次关键一学期，我每次科目刚好六十分，后面小学就这样被虐待毕业了，我也认命了！
　　My mother is a mentally ill. Since I was born, I don’t know what a normal mother looks like. She cries and sings on the hills of school every day and sometimes scolds people. If she is too crazy, she can’t find anyone. It’s from my childhood memories. My mother is often tied up. I often sleep with my mother. My mother often quarrels that I can’t do my homework. I dream of my mother going crazy and beating me and I am lost. The other children discriminate against me. I go ahead and other children use stones behind them. Lose me, Calling me a child born by a mad woman, I spent my childhood like this. It was simply a nightmare in my life. The more I hate my head teacher, his behavior triggers discrimination and disapproval of other classmates. Stop hurting, my heart is so cruel to my class teacher at that time. The more I hate the class teacher, the more I desire to be replaced by my father-in-law, who was the principal of the elementary school at the time, but this wish did not come true, because every semester is critical. Every time I got 60 points in my subjects, I was abused and graduated from elementary school later, and I accepted my fate too!
　　如果事与愿违，我便相信命运自有安排，我爷爷在我大学毕业的第二年去世，而出现在我爷爷葬礼上的公公就是我当年小时候很喜欢的老师，爷爷葬礼那天我特别开心，其他亲人都特别伤心的哭着，只有我那天特别兴奋，我觉得公公就是我死去的爷爷，爷爷并没有死，只是通过公公出现在我生活中。
　　If things go against my wishes, I believe that fate has its own arrangements. My grandfather passed away in the second year of my university graduation. The father-in-law who appeared at my grandfather’s funeral was the teacher I liked very much when I was a child. I was very happy on the day of my grandfather’s funeral. They were all very sad and crying. Only I was very excited that day. I think my father-in-law was my dead grandfather. Grandpa was not dead, but appeared in my life through his father-in-law.
　　后面两家人在闲聊中，说到各自儿女婚姻大事，经过相亲结婚，后面我成为我公公的儿媳妇，在后面的婚姻里，我和公婆一家人相处很开心，我童年缺失的母爱父爱在公婆身的得到一种弥补，小时候我觉得一家人一起开心吃顿饭对我都是奢望，而我结婚以后，每顿饭一家人可以幸福的一起吃，公婆一家人和我现在的生活，是我小时候和我爷爷奶奶那段生活的延续，我多年以后明白，原来当年公公不是我渴望的班主任，是上帝为了安排他做我的理想设定的父亲角色，让我们成为一家人，弥补我童年对一个普通家庭爱的渴望，我六年婚姻生活确实和公婆一家人过的其乐融融，我性格缺陷在公婆性格影响下得到很好塑造和修正，我从此便相信，念念不忘，生命必有回响。
　　In the back of the two families chatting, talking about their children＂s marriage event, after a blind date marriage, I became my father-in-law＂s daughter-in-law, in the back of the marriage, I and my parents-in-law family get along very happily, my childhood lack of maternal love and paternal love in the parents-in-law body to get a kind of compensation, when I was a child, I felt that the family had a happy meal together. Every meal family can be happy to eat together, parents-in-law family and my life now, is my childhood and my grandparents that life continuation, I understand after many years, the original father-in-law is not my desire for the class teacher, is God in order to arrange him to do my ideal set of father role, let us become a family, make up for my childhood to an ordinary family love. My six years of marriage and parents-in-law family really happy, my character defects in the parents-in-law under the influence of personality has been well shaped and corrected, I have since believed that, never forget, life will have an echo.
　　还有我希望自己以后的孩子都是女孩，我幻想假如我母亲无法给我好的教育，我以后有女儿，我应该培养自己做个好妈妈。如何更好的影响我的女儿，我想看看她会比我变得更好，确实命运让我生的都是女孩，我不喜欢男孩，因为我从小到大在重男轻女家庭长大，我经常因为弟弟聪明而不被看好，我特别自卑，但是我们这里人希望生男孩，而我根本不愿意，当我意外有一个孩子在我生命压力很大的时候，我那时候一点不希望自己做妈妈，而后三个月我先兆流产的孩子是男孩，我所预言自己的人生一定会发生在我生活中。
　　I also hope that my children in the future will be girls. I imagine that if my mother cannot give me a good education, I will have a daughter in the future and I should cultivate myself to be a good mother. How to better influence my daughter, I want to see that she will be better than me. It is true that fate made me give birth to girls. I don’t like boys because I grew up in a patriarchal family. I am often not favored because my younger brother is smart, I am particularly inferior, but we people here want to have a boy, And I don’t want it at all. When I accidentally had a child in my life when I was under great pressure, I didn’t want to be a mother at all at that time. In the next three months, my child with threatened miscarriage was a boy. I predicted that my life would be certain. Will happen in my life.
　　还有一次，我老公描述一个老人挡着马路不走，他说现在这种老人碰瓷要钱，我当时听完，脑子瞬间出现我老公骑着电动车碰到老奶奶，而后老奶奶摔倒后面被送医院，而这一切隔了一天就在我老公和我婆婆去看病那天，我老公去快递的时候刚好撞到一个老太太，并且一模一样的场景，还好没太大事故，花了点钱医院检查没事就过去了。
　　On another occasion, my husband described an old man blocking the road and not walking. He said that now this kind of old man touches porcelain and asks for money. After listening to it, my brain instantly appeared that my husband rode an electric bicycle and met his grandmother. Then the grandmother fell down and was sent to the hospital. All this happened one day after my husband and my mother-in-law went to see the doctor. My husband went to express delivery. And the same scene, fortunately not too big accident, spent some money on the hospital to check nothing on the past.
　　还有一次我老公工地干活完，在回家路上顺便买西瓜准备带回家路上，突然被一个骑摩托车的少年撞倒，还好我老公没事，对方被划破脸，而后我老公把这个人送医院，事实是那个孩子不懂交通规则骑着摩托车横穿马路撞到我老公，自己被反弹到一辆皮卡车以后摔伤的，后面我老公身上没钱，刚好撞到那个人和我们邻居村子一个人认识，借了一千块钱去带那个孩子进医院做检查，他们刚好还是亲戚关系，对方借着这事不断打电话威胁我公婆赔钱，不然起诉我们，那时候婆婆难过的每天都哭。
　　Another time my husband finished his work on the construction site and bought watermelon on the way home to take it home. Suddenly he was knocked down by a boy riding a motorcycle. Fortunately, my husband was okay, and his face was scratched. This person was taken to the hospital. The fact is that the kid didn’t understand the traffic rules and ran across the road on a motorcycle and hit my husband. He was bounced back into a pickup truck and then fell. My husband had no money behind him and just hit that person. I knew one person from our neighbor village,
　　Borrowed a thousand yuan to take the child to the hospital for an examination. They happened to be relatives. The other party used this to threaten my in-laws with money, or sued us. At that time, the mother-in-law was sad and crying every day.
　　隔了两天，我在家编辑文案工作，对方找我们家上门要钱，态度特别差，让我马上还钱，因为我是他老婆，我那时候没钱，我特别真诚给对方道歉，对方不依不饶对我说，有本事让你老公不要出车祸，我那时候说，我们自己也不愿意发生这样的事，但是事发生了，我也非常难过，不要担心我一定会还钱的。
　　Two days later, I was editing and copywriting work at home. The other party came to our house to ask for money. The attitude was so bad that he asked me to pay it back immediately. Because I was his wife and I had no money at that time, I sincerely apologized to the other party. Bu Rao told me that I have the ability to tell your husband not to have a car accident. At that time, I said that we don＂t want such a thing to happen, but when it happened, I was very sad. Don＂t worry that I will definitely pay back.
　　然后我难过的和对方说，假如这件事发生你身上，你就不会这样和我说话，你就会明白我因为此事多么的难过。我希望你们亲戚早点好起来，对方还是不依不饶骂我，说我老公借钱不还，后面公婆把钱给了对方以后，他便离开我们家。
　　Then I said sadly to the other party, if this happened to you, you would not talk to me like this, and you would understand how sad I was because of this. I hope your relatives will get better soon. The other party still refuses to scold me, saying that my husband borrowed the money and didn＂t pay it back. After the in-laws gave the money to the other party, he left our house.
　　隔了一个多月，这个对我态度很差，说我老公借钱不还的人，骂我有本事不要让我老公出车祸的人，有一天去街上带着自己老婆和妈妈去镇上赶集，据说那天还是他生日，而后他开车路上出了车祸，母亲车祸身亡，这一切都是发生在我生活里真实的故事。
　　After more than a month, this person had a very bad attitude towards me, saying that my husband borrowed money and didn＂t pay it back, and someone who scolded me for having the ability not to let my husband get involved in a car accident. One day he went to the street and took his wife and mother to town. Going to the fair, it is said that it was his birthday that day, and then he was in a car accident while driving, and his mother was killed in a car accident. All these are true stories that happened in my life.
　　柯林斯说：我在没遇到你以前，总以为自己的人生是一个人独自崩溃，又一个人悄悄自愈，没想到你人生也是和我一样，有如此多的不幸，但是幸运的是，所求皆所愿 ，所行皆坦途，能如愿以偿何其荣幸，可从不得偿所愿才是人生，当你明白这一点，并且接纳这就是人生的真相以后，人生会发生逆转，世事不会尽如人意，工作，情感，生活如此，最值得感恩的是，我们明白这一切，依然对生活保持善良和希望，我相信你就是那个坠入人间的天使，而我是如此幸运，这么可爱善良的你让我这么幸运的遇见，我亲爱的海伦，我是如此爱你，因为你就是我一直在寻找的那个人。
　　Collins said: Before I met you, I always thought that my life was a breakdown of one person alone, and another person quietly healed himself. I did not expect that your life is the same as mine, with so many misfortunes, but fortunately, all It’s a great honor to be able to get what you want, but what you want is an honor. When you understand this and accept that this is the truth of life, life will be reversed and things will not be the same Satisfactory, Work, emotions, and life are like this. The most grateful thing is that we understand all this and still maintain kindness and hope for life. I believe you are the angel who fell into the world, and I am so lucky, so cute and kind you let me Such a lucky encounter, my dear Helen, I love you so much, because you are the person I have been looking for.
　　海伦说：我即使经历任何不幸，但是我一直在思考，日子反正要过，愁眉苦脸，不如眉开眼笑，一念之差，云泥之别，我才不与自己作对，我已经命运遭遇够不幸，而我应该好好善待这样一个自己，所以我慢慢学会去爱这个充满困难的我自己，在爱自己的同时，我也学会了爱他人。
　　Helen said: Even if I experience any misfortunes, I have been thinking about it. Life is about to pass anyway. It is better to open my eyes and smile. I will not be against myself because of the difference in thoughts and the difference between clouds and mud. My destiny has suffered enough misfortune, and I should be well. Be kind to such a self, so I slowly learn to love myself who is full of difficulties. While loving myself, I also learned to love others.
　　随着我成长渐渐明白，我不应该不再追求所谓的圆满，就好像月亮圆着圆着就亏了，我每天接水的水桶太满了，满着满着就溢了，经常弄湿我裤子，所以我不会给桶子接太满的水，这样不会因为因为提起来太重而使水洒满我裤子，凡事七八成圆满、留二三分缺憾，别人看着也不会不生嫉恨，自身可以永远保持着一份成长努力斗志，人生啊，所有遗憾皆是成全，有所缺失，才是境界，因为那是光照进来的地方，所以即使经历任何不开心，我依然微笑向暖，阳光灿烂，因为我觉得爱笑的女孩，运气会很好，好运会寻光芒而来，所以我负责让自己努力发光，因为我相信，总会有人爱上我的微笑。
　　As I grow up, I gradually understand that I shouldn’t stop pursuing the so-called perfection, as if the moon is round and round and loses. The bucket that I receive water every day is too full, and it overflows when it’s full, and it often wets me. Trousers, so I will not fill the bucket with too much water, so I won’t spill the water over my trousers because it’s too heavy to lift up. Everything is 70% to 80% perfect, leaving two or three points of regret, and others will not look at it. There is no jealousy, and you can always maintain a growth and hard work spirit. In life, all regrets are fulfilled, and something is missing, which is the realm. Because that is where the light comes in, so even if I experience any unhappiness, I still smile warmly and the sun is shining, because I think a girl who loves to laugh, luck It will be very good, good luck will find light, so I am responsible for making myself shine, because I believe that someone will fall in love with my smile.
　　柯林斯说：我在微信群看到你头像的那一刻，被你微笑和眼神深深的吸引和治愈，我觉得你笑起来的样子如此神奇，并且很迷人，在看到你的那一刻，我的直觉告诉我，你就是我要找的人，于是我添加你做了好友，亲爱的海伦，你是坠入我生命中的天使，我爱你！
　　Collins said: The moment I saw your avatar in the WeChat group, I was deeply attracted and healed by your smile and eyes. I think the way you laugh is so amazing and charming. The moment I saw you, I My instinct told me that you are the person I was looking for, so I added you as a friend, dear Helen, you are the angel who fell into my life, I love you!