ThePurrPrinciple：HowWeCanBuild

　　标题：ThePurrPrinciple：HowWeCanBuildGreatRelationships
　　source：forbes丨BrettSteenbarger
　　翻译请保留原文链接哦
　　欲翻译的小伙伴，可评论领稿，并把已完成的译文发在自己的心理圈or个人主页的日志内。请领稿的小伙伴，尽量在一个星期内完成翻译，谢谢！！
　　Dr。JudyKringshaswrittenonaninterestingtopic：relationshipresilience。Wenormallythinkofresilienceasanindividualfunction，reflectingaperson’sabilitytoweatheradversityandevenbenefitfromit。Greatrelationshipsareresilient，aswell。Theynotonlysurvivelife’supsanddowns，butactuallythrive，maintainingloyaltyandlovethroughout。
　　Whetherit’sinthebusinessworldortherealmofromance，sustainingpositiverelationshipsisessentialtosuccess。TamaraGSeligman’sworksuggeststhatrelationshipsareoneoffivedimensionsconnectedtoemotionalwellbeing。Buthowcanwebuildbetterrelationships，makingfriendshipandromancetrulyresilient？
　　ResilienceStartsWithSolutions
　　Acoretenetofthesolutionfocusedapproachtopsychologyisthatwecanmakesurprisinglyrapidandmeaningfulchangessimplybydoingmoreofwhatisalreadyworkinginourlives。Ptheydefinethegoalofthehelpingrelationshipasremovinganegativestateofaffairs。Thesolutionfocusedtherapistlooksforoccasionswhentheproblemisnotoccurring。Veryoften，thoseexceptionoccasionsaretimeswhen，unwittingly，wearedoingsomethingveryright。
　　Soifthequestionisbuildingbetterrelationships，wecouldapproachtheissuefromaproblemmindsetandaskaboutthebehaviorsthatderailrelationshipsandsimplyavoidengaginginthose。Amoment’sthought，however，suggeststhatstrong，resilientrelationshipsarenotmerelyonesthatavoidpettyargumentsandpoorcommunication。It’sthepresenceofpositiveelements，notmerelytheabsenceofnegativeones，thatdefinesagreatbusinessorlifepartnership。AsMarcusBuckinghamexplains，shoringupweaknessescannot，initself，alignourselveswithourstrengthsandactuallystrengthenthem。
　　Fromasolutionfocusedperspective，welearnaboutsuccessfulrelationshipsbyreverseengineeringourmostsuccessfulmomentsofrelating。Whatarewedoingwhenwefeelmostconnected，mostinlove，mostinsyncwithanother？Whenwedomoreofwhatworks，wedon’teliminateallourweaknesseswesimplyensurealevelofresiliencethatallowsustoweatherthoseshortcomings。